Stupid Rewrites of Episodes
by yugischic08
Summary: Rating is for just in case. This is a story done by me and my friend Danny'sGhostGirl........it's about stupid rewrites of episodes...like the title says. We also make Kaiba do some really stupid things.
1. The Scars of Defeat redone like

YC: Well hello everyone it is me and my frisend Danny'sGhostGirl....waves.

DGG: yup, i'm goin to be writing this story with her cuz we're friends and its fun yupyupyuperix......... anyways....... well we're going to sort of rewrite episodes of ygo. Make Kaiba do weird and some really stupid things ( and we're not bashing Kaiba). yupyupyuperix.

YC: we're going to be rewriting " The Scars of Defeat" this chapter. This time we'll be writing the chapter together, but later on we'll be alternating between.

both: enjoy!!!!

DISCLAIMER: We don't own the show in any way or form........we wish though..heehee

Chpt 1: The Scars of Defeat (re-done like)

* * *

It starts out at Duelist Kingdom. Tea, Tristan, and Joey were sleeping in one big pile bedside the tent(A/N: don't ask me why) while Yugi and Bakura were talking.

" I don't know, Bakura," said Yugi. " I don't think it will."

" Why wouldn't it?" he asked.

" Well....." started Yugi.

" What! You don't think that my Millenium Ring can fly away?" cried Bakura.

" Um....... Bakura, that has nothing to do with what we were talking about," said Yugi.

" It's not?" Bakura asked. " Then what have we been talking about for the past hour?"

Yugi sighed and shook his head from side to side. Sometimes he didn't want to know what was going on inside his friends' minds. Joey was probably dreaming about food again. Tristan.....well....who knows. Tea...... who cares. Just then, a helicopter came flying up, waking up the others.

" Hey, what's going on?" asked Tea.

" Dude, it's like all loud dude!" cried Tristan.

" IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD!!!!!!!!!!" yelled Joey.

He got up and started running around like a deranged chicken while everybody just stared at him. The helicopter went flying all over the place. Its blades cut off the tops of trees that landed on top of Tea! Heehee. Everyone watched as it did backflips and eventually crashed in front of them. Miraculously out of the mess came Seto Kaiba, completely unharmed.

" Whoa, I need to learn to fly that thing better," he said aloud, then noticed everyone staring at him and regained his normal bussiness like composure," I'm here for Mokuba and that is it!"

" Um, ok....." said Tristan.

" What's Wheeler doing?" asked Kaiba.

Everyone looked at Joey who was still running around like a deranged chicken.

" Oh, he's running around like a deranged chicken," said Bakura.

" Wheeler!" yelled Kaiba, walking over to him.

" Huh?" Joey said, stopping his random action." Kaiba, when did you get here?"

Just then, Kaiba punched Joey making him fall to the ground. Then, he kicked him in the stomach," That's for calling me a rich boy!" he kicked him again," That's for calling me a snob!" He kicked him again," I don't know what to say here!" Next, Kaiba ran away, and came back and kicked Joey again, " AND THATS FOR EXISTING!!!!" Then, he ran away for the final time.

Everyone just stared with wide eyes the entire time. Joey just laid there on the ground, moaning and holding his stomach.

" Well, what should we do now?" asked Bakura.

" Help me," said Joey.

" Hmmmm, I dunno," said Yugi.

" A little help here please!!" cried Joey.

" We could duel," suggested Tristan.

" GUYS!!!"

" No, we do that every other day," said Yugi.

" PLEASE!!! I THINK HE BROKE MY SPINE!!!!!" yelled Joey (A/N: wow, thats a hard kick to the stomach... I think)

" Do you hear something?" Yugi asked Tristan.

" Huh...no. I don't hear anything."

" HEY YOU PEOPLE OVER THERE COME AND HELP ME!" Joey yelled at his friends.

" Hmmm I must be hearing things then," Yugi stated.

" Hey guys where's Joey?" Tea asked finally able to get out of the pile of trees.

" I'M OVER HERE YOU STUPID BLIND PEOPLE! IN PAIN!!!!"

" I don't know," everyone said.

Tea pulls a branch out of her ear, "huh...ok then."

Everyone just looks at Tea and walks away.

" HEY GUYS.....DON'T LEAVE ME HERE!!" Joey yelled. "AND I HATE YOUR HAT, YUGI!!!!"

" What hat?" Yugi asked to no one around him.

" THE ONE ON YOUR HEAD YOU DUMB-BEEP" (A/N: yes he actually said dumb-beep)

" What's a dumb-beep?" Yugi asked.

" NOW YOU NOTICE ME!!"

" JOEY WHERE THE BEEP ARE YOU?!" Yugi yelled at Joey....who was right in front of him.

" I'M RIGHT HERE YOU BEEP BEEP BEEP!"

" LOOK WHO'S TALKING YOU BEEP BEEP!"

" SHUT UP YOU BEEP BEEP STUPID BEEP BEEP!"

" WILL YOU SHUT THE BEEP UP, YOU BUNCH OF BEEP BEEPS!" yelled Tristan.

" JUST SHUT UP YOU MEEPS!" Bakura cried out over them.

Everyone (A/N: including us authoresses) looked at Bakura all funny like. Which caused this to break loose, " BEEP BEEP BEEP MEEP......BEEP BEEP BEEP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP.....BEEP YOU BEEPIN BEEP! BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP" a little later,"......MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP YOU MEEPIN BLOODY MEEPIN MEEPS.....SHUT THE BEEPIN UP YOU BEEPIN MEEP" everyone turns to look at Yami (A/N: including us again)......" what?.........SHUT UP YOU BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP"

At that moment Kaiba comes running in fom no where, to see what was making all the racket....." Wow that was you geeks?......HOLY BEEP THAT WAS LOUD!" then runs up to everyone and punches them, except Joey, who he kicks yet again and then runs away , this time for the real last time.

* * *

DGG: And this is where we stop the first chapter. :D haha. You poor people waiting in suspense......I guess you are. heeheehee

YC: Yes were ending it here but before we do I would like to say something....... when they were all saying "BEEP" and "MEEP" they were actually saying "BEEP" and "MEEP" and not a cuss words....I just wanted all of you to know that.

DGG: Yup....and I would like to say that I will be writing the next chapter. Its about Kaiba tryong to get Mokuba from Pegassus' castle. So anyways.... please review and tell us what you think......


	2. The Nameless Chapter :D

DGG: okiez, i shall be writing this chpt. 4 u guyz 2 njoy. Itz like...6 episodez combined....so.... i dont care. :D just njoy it! :D

I donut own Yu-Gi-Oh or nething related to Monty Python and the Holy Grail :D i wish though

* * *

Chpt 2: The nameless Chapter :D

Kaiba finally made it to Pegasus' castle, made it past all the guards, and was outside his brother's cell.

" Big Sister!" Mokuba cried happily.

" No, I'm brother," Seto corrected.

" ... Big Brother!" cried Mokuba happily. " I bet you have some high-tech plan to get me out of here, right?"

" Actually no."

" Oh."

" I came to see if he was feeding you," said Kaiba. " It looks like he is so I'll be leaving now."

" But you like to pick locks, Seto."

" That's true. Okay I'll pick the lock on your cell."

" Yay!"

Just then, Pegasus came in," Kaiba-girl..."

" Boy," Seto corrected.

" Right, Kaiba-boy," said Pegasus. " I see you've come for you brother."

" Actually, he's only picking the lock," said Mokuba.

" Whatever."

Then, Pegasus' Millenium Eye started to glow, Kaiba shut his eyes, Mokuba screamed, Kaiba looked over and gasped, Pegasus smirked, Mokuba was doin a funky dance, and Kaiba was all mad, and Pegasus laughed evilly, and I'll shut up now.

" You monster!" cried Kaiba. " What have you done to him!"

" Nothing," Pegasus said innocently. " I just found that he'd be easier to deal with now."

" You're not human."

" Heehee. Take these five chips and challenge Yugi to a duel, and I might give you your brother back."

" Please tell me he won't be dancing when you give him back."

" Um...sure why not."

" Fine, it's a deal."

Outside Yugi, Joey, Tristan, Tea and Bakura had finally made it to the castle. Kaiba was standing at the top of the steps, waiting for them.

" Hey, who is that?" asked Yugi.

" Is that the girl from gym class?" Joey asked Tristan.

" It looks like it," said Tristan.

" Bloody Hell she's hot!" cried Bakura. " What do you think Tea?"

" That's a tree!" cried Tea.

" Oh," the boys said in disappointment.

" You think it would go out with me anyways?" asked Bakura.

" YUGI! I challenge you to a duel!" yelled Kaiba.

" What?" Yugi called back.

" I challenge you to a duel!"

" HUH?"

" I AM CHALLENGING YOU TO A DUEL!"

" I CAN'T HEAR YOU! YOU'RE TOO FAR AWAY!"

" I'M THREE CENTIMETERS AWAY FROM YOU! HOW IS THAT TOO FAR AWAY?"

" He challenged you to a duel, Yugi," Joey told him.

" Oh," said Yugi. " OKAY KAIBA, I ACCEPT!"

" We'll duel on the annex roof," said Kaiba. " It's this-a-way."

So they all followed Kaiba to the annex roof. Yugi had transformed into Yami, and Kaiba gave him one of his duel discs.

" We'll duel using these," said Kaiba.

" Why?" asked Yami.

" Because I am the CEO who says nih!" he said. " You must do as I say."

" Yes, we will, Ceo that says nih," said Yami.

They started dueling. Kaiba put a monster on the field, Yami killed it, then Kaiba almost killed that monster, but the Dark Magician killed his instead, and we all already know this. Then, Kaiba started acting differently.

" Hey Yuuugi, I dunno what I should do with this here card," he said in a southern accent.

" What?" Yami blinked.

" It says ' Blue Eyes White Dragon' on it," he continued. " So...what do I do? Put in in the one mode thingy or the other?"

" Um... I don't know," said Yami.

" What's with Kaiba!" cried Joey.

" I don't know," said Tristan. " But I never want to hear Kaiba talk like a hillbilly ever again!"

" Or act so stupid," added Tea.

" That tree was hot," Bakura said aloud.

Everyone stared at him. (A/N: I did 2. Just cuz itz fun)

" Oooo! Thurr is a-lot-oh trees around these here parts," said Kaiba. " You got to be more spific."

" I've got to be what?" asked Bakura.

" I think he means specific," said Yami.

" How would you know?" asked Joey.

" I WAS A PHARAOH! YOU MUST ALL BOW DOWN TO ME!" he cried.

" Um... okay then," said Tea.

" I NEEDS A SACRIFICE FOR YOU TO WIN THE DUEL!" cried Kaiba.

" What do you need, CEO who says nih?" asked Yami.

" I want... two pine cones," he said with a wide smile.

" That's just plain scary," Joey whispered to Tea.

" Mmhmm."

" Okay," said Yami. " I will aquire the two pine cones."

Yami ran to the forest, where he found Mai.

" Why are you in such a hurry?" she asked.  
" I must find two pine cones," Yami told her.

" Um... why can't you just pick two from the ground?"

" Because the CEO who says nih will be very displeased."

" THE CEO WHO SAYS NIH! NOT HIM!"

" Yes, he wants two pine cones."

Mai cowered in fear and eventually ran away.

An hour later, Yami returned with two pine cones.

" I have done your task, CEO who says nih."

" Very good, but there is one prob-a-lum," Kaiba answered.

" What is it?"

" I am no longer the CEO who says nih."

" Who are you now?"

" I am now the CEO who says ekyekyekywowshabang."

" O...kay..."

" So now I need...fifteen coconuts and a gum wrapper."

" I don't have those."

" YOU HAVE LOST THE DUEL!" he yelled. " Bye."

Kaiba pulled his pants up (A/N: they were already up. I'm sayin he pulled em up farther so he lookz like an even bigger dork) and walked into the castle...then he walked over and opened the door first, then entered it.

Then ,Yami turned back into Yugi.

" NO!" he cried. " I WAS SO CLOSE TO DEFEATING HIM! NOW HOW AM I GOING TO GET MY GRANDMA'S..."

" Grandpa's," corrected Joey.

"... GRANDPA'S SOUL BACK!"

" You have all of your star chips," said Tea.

" Yeah, you didn't lose anything by losing this duel," said Bakura.

" Oh... Then let's go."

Next, they ran inside the castle to find that Kaiba was about to duel Pegasus.

" I'll duel you Kaiba," said Pegasus.

" Kay, Peggy," he said.

" Peggy? Did you just call me Peggy?"

" Yep."

" Uh...okay..."

" Why am I duelin you, Peggy?"

" To get your brother back."

" I WANT ALL THREE OF THEM BACK!"

" Three!" cried everyone.

" I want Mo, Ku, and Ba back. Everytime I go into their room there is only one there!"

" Um... sure. You can have all of them back..."

" Is Kaiba going insane?" asked Joey.

" Maybe," said Yugi.

" Why does he think that he has three brothers?" asked Tristan.

" I have no idea," said Bakura.

" Okay Kaiba, if we duel with your discs I have a request," said Pegasus...or Peggy.

" What?"

" You'll have to duel....."

Then, the doors behind Peggy opened, music started playing, and Mokuba came out dancing.

" Mokuba."

" Mokuba? YOU MEAN MY BROTHERS ALL FUSED TOGETHER!"

" Uh...sure."

" NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

" You need to get some soul and listen deeply to the music," sang Mokuba.

" Right," said Peggy.

" HEY KAIBA!" yelled Joey. " SAY MAXAMILLION!"

" Maxamil...Maxami...Lemon," he said.

" Lemon!" cried Peggy.

" Yeah."

" Are you saying that my name is Lemon Peggy?"

" Yeah."

" Ok.........."

" Can we duel for da perdy pink chopstick instead?" asked Kaiba.

" I don't have a pretty.."

" PERDY!"

"...perdy pink chopstick."

" I gots one," said Kaiba. " In my pocket."

" Why?"

" Cuz I like pink things," Kaiba said with a huge smile.

" I'm just gonna put an end to this now and say I won the duel," said Pegasus.

" Huh?"

" Listen, CEO who says nih," started Pegasus.

" NO! I now say ekyekyekywowshabang!" Kaiba yelled.

" Listen, CEO... who just as recently said nih," said Pegasus. " I won the duel. Therfore, you must pay the price."

" NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

" You must lose the title of CEO who says whatever you said to me. GUARDS, take him away and teach him to clean my house."

So the guards took Kaiba away, and Mokuba danced out of the room.

" No, he was only trying to help his little brother!" cried Yugi. " PEGASUS WILL PAY!"

Then, he turned into Yami, " PEGASUS, you will pay." Then, he turned back into Yugi.

" What was that about?" asked Joey.

" Huh? Iono," said Yugi.

Then, they all went off to prepare for the 1st round of stuff.

* * *

DGG: This is where I end this chpt. I hate my computer..............newayz.....plz review :D 


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